Built on a balance beam of arousal, it is the side-by-side extremes of what twopeople want and how those desires compliment, oppose and interplay with one another that fuels most BDSM sex. Though the specifics of action, clothes worn, and words said and even roles played matters greatly in each given scenario-to a lesser or greater degree depending on the scenario-the entire edifice that is kinky sex is built on the intermingling of opposites. Even for the players the entire hierarchy of what is happening might allude them the more aroused they become, yet opposites do attract with kinky sex in the most basic of ways.
Its obvious in a dom/sub scenario how opposites fuel the fun. In almost any situation, from the most obvious top/bottom power-play pairing where a leather clad dominatrix beats her willing naked slave to a woman acting as a little girl crying over a recent spanking and her lesbian lover masturbating over the subs tears, it really is the flotsam and jetsam spinning off in completely divergent directions, but somehow meeting at a imploding focal point that sends both partners to the moon
sexually speaking. Have couples no defined opposite-at least in their minds-a lukewarm reaction to what they are doing or a lackluster interest in their roles the scenes will not play out as well. This is why, in the truest sense of the word, there are very few S&M switches; most participants when polled will admit to either a resolutely dominant or submissive head space and desire. It is the defined role that works best against anothers defines role.
To the outsider, the critic even, BDSM gaming seems sadistic, perverse and sad. The question is often why people need all the drama, the playacting, the pain even in their sexual lives. But what the vanilla layman fails to grasp is the interplay of the opposites, which is, in its way the most important part of a BDSM relationship. The release, whether it be an orgasm or just a flood of endorphins, comes less from the physical twists and turns a subs body is put through and the dom being the catalyst putting them through it, but the fact that in the moment of truth, foreplay and orgasm opposites are their most opposite but coexisting.
Finding the right person for you can be very frustrating sometimes. Even if singles are just looking for a fuck buddy it can seem very difficult. There are many decent people who just want a good sex partner to keep them company without the involvement of a relationship full blown. You may be one of them and if you are you have to be willing to stick it out to do the right thing for yourself. It can be a regrettable experience to get involved with someone that is only partially compatible or not even at all. This happens more often out of desperation than anything else. You get desperate, and have a weak moment, and make a mistake and end up fucking someone that may want to stick around when you do not afterward. It is just very important that you do the right things for yourself and take the time necessary to see it through. It will be a wise decision and one of your better ones. It may be that in the long run of things just getting a piece of ass now and again is what you need to see you through a difficult or busy time in your life so that you can be better prepared to give someone a full and complete relationship later. Perhaps you are going to school or are going through a particularly rough and busy time at work. Whatever the reason it may be that the times simply aren’t right that you be involved deeply with someone at this point.
Considering all this perhaps you should try an adult dating site to help see you through the lean times. There are plenty other people out there looking, feeling dejected, not knowing where to turn; and many find themselves on-line. It may be just the thing to help keep your spirits up so you can avoid depression, stay focused and get the job done whatever that may be. If you stick to your guns and do right by yourself you will be well thankful that you did when you can look back and see clearly all the challenges you overcame and how much more difficult it would have been had you become depressed.
A couple marching towards the inevitability of a break-up truly needs to break-up. The results of a split-certainly the dissolving of a marriage-can be catastrophic, with deep repercussions for children and financial futures, but the final decision for a couple to call it quits certainly cannot come too soon for lovers truly in pain and at the end of their tenure.
An off again/on again wavering of partners who know they must call it quits but still keep hanging on takes an exacting toll. The human animal stagnates in an atmosphere of hazy resolutions and unsure goals. Make-up sex is desperate sex when it is the very last intimacy two people share. The infinite possibilities of on-line dating might seem attractive but those possibilities do not exist when two people are locked in the heated death throes of an Icarus-like descent. Fence-sitting only sees one with a mighty sore rump and no real resolution; change must be effected.
Painful as it is splitting, it is as mind-numbing to stay locked together in the world of a love gone sour. Defeating the purpose of growing through to the point where partners learn they can no longer be together, some do indeed stay together. Still, many couples maintain long relationships long after they fall out of love simply to provide a steady home for their kids or not to embarrass their parents. Too many partners have stayed together in an attempt to salvage at least one small kernel of their domesticity only to find that in the end they rend their very sanity from stem to stern living a life with someone they no longer care about
which is no life at all.
No one has the benefit of a crystal ball to see that after the dust settles and times heals wounds, the possibility of happiness, other loves and even better sex exists down the line. But in the middle of a long-term love affair ending all we see, feel and even taste is the what-we-once-had compared to the shards of what-we-now-have and the difference is a wide chasm none of us ever feel we can jump across. Loving again seems an impossibility, as does even thinking naughty thoughts about another human being again, yet someone we all do plow further forward.
But we need to break-up first to even think about furrowing the field.
There are some people who have become imbalanced and thrive on drama and other unnecessary intrusions. They think that being in a relationship, or even adult dating is all about some kind of titanic struggle all the time. This is extremely wearisome for the other partner and for friends and other loved ones around. These people desperately need to put things into focus and perspective and realize that being with someone will have its ups and downs to be sure but it is not all about fighting and challenges. These people may be suffering from a lack of self esteem that makes them feel like they are not important and so they feel a need for things of importance to happen to them. There are many different reasons why someone may be like this. They can often be difficult to spot until after you have already gotten sexually involved with them and then their trap is sprung. Extricating oneself from the tsunami of constant emotional upheaval is in of itself dramatic and what the dramatic want anyway!
If one is fortunate one may be able to spot the drama kings and queen is life before one lets them close or even lets them in to ones sex life. if the dram troupe moves it is best to simply find someone else to fuck or else go home and masturbate and be done with it. It can be difficult to be sure, but sometimes you have to override your own senses and abandon the project as it could be entirely too costly to in the long run. You are better of being single and looking for a while longer than getting wrapped up with a person like this. If you are already involved with someone like this then you are in a living and breathing soap opera and everyday there is a titanic struggle which could threaten to end your world as you know it. You must expend a great deal of energy to deal with this and settle things down to normal, just so they can explode again when that person feels things are too quiet. It is a tremendously expensive cycle to go through and should be broken as quickly and surely as possible.
Something that all adult dating enthusiast have in common is that little voice inside your head that is constantly bombarding you with the “what if” possibility of your casual sex partner turning into something more. And while the last thing we want is to actually get romantically involved with someone else – for now, at least – every once in awhile, a special person rolls around and we are left hoping that we had met them through a traditional versus top ten dating websites instead. After all, meeting someone through adult personals means that even the remote suggestion of there being something more could result in your casual partner walking away entirely.
After a recent study was conducted on the behavioral patterns behind fellow online daters, many hoped to find answers behind how most long-term relationships start. The results, were nothing short of astounding:
- 71% of people admitted to falling in love with someone who they were not initially attracted to in any way, shape, or form. They claimed that after getting to know them and discovering mutual interests, they began to develop romantic feelings.
- 35% of people admitted to falling in love with someone who they felt nothing for in the beginning
- 35% of people admitted to falling in love with someone who was initially a casual sex partner or hookup
I figured this would prove valuable to those who are set on free dating sites and refuse to allow themselves to fall in love. While I’m not saying that you should immediately try to turn your next fling into a boyfriend or girlfriend, don’t eliminate the possibility of a relationship entirely. If the next person you meet through your favorite adult personals meet-up just so happens to be incredibly interesting and charming, give the concept of long-term relationships a second though. I might be well-worth it.
When talking about men and erections, we all expect that what goes up, will at some point come down. But what happens when that doesn’t happen? Yes ladies and gentleman, delayed ejaculation – also knows as (DE) – seems to be more popular than ever. While some may think that this is far from a problem, think again. Suffering from delayed ejaculation could mean anything from only being able to get off through masturbation, taking forever to orgasm or worst, not being able to orgasm at all. Being that this is an adult dating blog, if any of you are suffering from any of these symptoms, you’ll know that this could prove to be a real nightmare.
Below I’ll highlight some of the factors that could secretly be leading to you face erectile dysfunction and are putting a damper on your attempts at casual sex.
- With more and more men taking anti-depressants like Zoloft, Prozac and Paxil, it’s no surprise that a lot of them are also suffering from sexual side-effects. Many of these pills are known to delay orgasms and even eliminate it complete. Lesson learned? If you don’t need it, don’t take it.
- It seems as thought women’s complaints over all that free porn are finally starting to prove right. Since so many men are becoming obsessed with adult films and cyber sex, over-masturbation is causing many to increase their threshold, making it a lot harder to climax during real-life intercourse.
- Back to the subject of porn, studies show that since so many men are used to all sorts of bizarre visuals stemming from adult films, it now takes a lot more than traditional romping to satisfy their needs. This disorder even has a name, Sexual Attention Deficit Disorder so consider cutting back on the porn.
- When a man masturbates, he is a lot more likely to apply high levels of pressure to his penis than during regular intercourse. This might eventually lead him to get used to his own touch and have a much harder time getting things done in the sack. They call it an “idiosyncratic masturbatory style”.